Sign up for our newsletter

Stay informed on our latest news!

Seizing the Dey

His interest in dance started in the mid-90’s as an elementary student. Dey was taken by the art of West African dance, and with this initial knack for expressing himself through movement, the young creative soon found himself sufficiently trained in styles such as hip hop, street jazz, and dance hall. A little over 3 years ago is when the pole was beckoned to the master. “Admittedly, I've always secretly wanted to be a stripper and that's exactly what I've always correlated pole dancing with," he tells us. "I felt strippers—specifically the women who did it—held so much power in dictating how they expressed themselves sexually, and the power behind using their sexuality/sensuality to hustle and grind.”

In the summer of 2017, Dey was working at a non-profit organization in the Bronx that wanted to work with a local pole studio, Poletic Justice. After visiting the studio, his passion was solidified. Looking for more opportunities, thanks to that self-motivated hustler mentality, he was nudged by best friend Todd (also a drag queen, Robyn Banks) to sign up for Aerial EDGJ’s Pole Play NYC, despite no experience under his belt other than his dance teachings.

 

He unsurprisingly bodied the energy needed to impress, with no formal lessons. Dey recalls, “Although I looked crazy, the crowd and the rest of the performers were so supportive. I never felt that kind of vibe before with all of the years I've danced! All of the inspiration prompted me to buy a pole for my home...and at this time, I was 27 still living with my mom!” An essential piece of his self-confidence came through finding acceptance with himself as a black, gay and HIV positive man in today’s world. 

Working the pole and letting go of harbored insecurities provided the foundation he felt needed in order to find the version of himself that would encourage others to look within and find their innermost authentic self as well. Being HIV positive, Dey admits to having experienced much despair due to the misconceptions and stigmas of the disease. “There was a point where I believed HIV would end my life's plans, but it honestly gave me a second lease on life,” he reflects. “Through the many doctors and people I've been blessed to cross paths with, I wanted to let others who look like me know there is a chance for us to live after the diagnosis. Once I've gotten over that initial fear on top of opening myself up to the many possibilities brought my way, life started to blossom for me.”

 

Never imagining that the two polarizing forces would mix one day, Dey manifested it so that his art linked with his activism. With the help of AIDS Healthcare Foundation, Dey collaborated with the Gay and Lesbian Center and HIV Stops With Me to create a pole dance rendition of Broadway’s RENT, titled “Out Tonight." The amount of effort put into such a production is typical of Dey, if you hadn't realized that yet, and it has yet to see an end anywhere near. The superstar can be found monthly answering questions on HIV Stops with Me.

Despite quarantining by himself in his apartment, Dey confesses that 2020 has been ripe with blessings thus far—it has produced an organic shoot being unveiled today on office, a 30th birthday, and becoming the curator of his own show, Black Phoenix Nest (a hip-hop inspired pole revue held at The Tank).

 

Aware that blessings are in disguise but always abundant, Dey ties up our email interview with words of advice to all artist: “Allow yourself to make mistakes. Allow yourself to not know ANYTHING. Within those moments, you will be able to learn, will be able to improve, and will be able to make the steps necessary to grow and become the best you can be. With this in mind, I had to learn to own who I am as an artist, and not let anyone else dictate what my art should look like for me. What held me back over the years were other people's perceptions of what I should do as a male dancer. Once I found the place that allowed me to express my femininity and sexuality, my voice and art became stronger and could not be denied. I encourage any artists—whether dancer, singer, actor, or otherwise—to be unapologetic in their expression. Where some may not gravitate towards your truth, others surely will. It's only when you begin to accept your own truth will people begin to really see you.”

Confirm your age

Please confirm that you are at least 18 years old.

I confirm Whooops!