What is your ideal office?
My ideal office is to work wherever I want to work, and that becomes my office. And to work out of my home.
What is your refreshment of choice?
Organic tea.
If you had to, which of the five senses would you give up and why?
Smell, because I live in New York City.
What is your relationship with the past?
Rocky.
How were you introduced to astrology?
It was just over some stupid guy honestly. This guy I was interested in, my romantic eye of desire was acting really crazy and I couldn’t quite figure him out. I happened upon this book called Secrets From A Stargazer’s Notebook by Debbi Kempton Smith, and I was reading a chapter on the demented Venus positions. I realized I was dating all of them. So I was like, Oh my gosh! If astrology can tell me so much from just looking up the Venus position, what else can I learn?
What is the last great thing you read?
My last Yelp review. Apparently I’m Jesus.
Where in outer space would you most like to visit?
Venus, to find true love.
What role does clothing play in your practice?
Well, my fashion is part of my artistry, and I’ve been described as kinetic art—living, moving, breathing art. I didn’t say it, people have said it. Actually Marina Picasso said it, she was at a performance I did. She came up to me and said “Oh darling, you’re like moving art,” and I go, “Yeah yeah, thanks bitch.” Literally. My friend goes, “Do you know who that was?” and I’m like, “I have no idea.” She’s like, “That was Marina Picasso. She’s in town to sell her granddad’s paintings.” But yes, what I wear plays a big role because it’s part of my art, which is part of my being. And that’s what I share with my clients, so when they walk in—not to quote Time Out—they get a whole performance art package. I don’t just read their stars, I entertain them. I sing, I do performance art, I use props, and people tell me I’m hilarious but I don’t know what they’re talking about. So yes, the visual image is very important.
Who has challenged you the most in life?
Every fucking Leo I’ve ever known. And New York City landlords.
What sort of weather makes you emotional?
Super, super humid end of August. The drudgery. Especially in New York, the air is liquid. Super humid, hot New York City.
Do you believe there are new deities to be discovered?
Hmm. Yes.
What is the magic word?
Well, when you want something from somebody, you say please, and when you get that something you say thank you.
Do you have any bad habits?
Binge watching Law and Order SVU, and carbicide.
How do you find strength in times of despair?
*sings* “Without my funny bone, I would’ve died, many times over. Without my funny bone I would’ve died, many times over. Of blood loss and love loss, and being alone, without my funny bone. Mr. Funny bone, won’t you make me laugh? Mr. Funny bone, ‘cause that’s your craft. Won’t you make my troubles hop away, like a bunny, bunny, Mr. Funny Bone...” My sense of humor.
