Living in Abundance with Cafe Dewanee

Computerwife started when Warncke was 18, after downloading an Ableton free trial to follow the steps laid out by Grimes in a Song Exploder episode. It was a form of spirituality for Warncke, an attempt at reaching a higher consciousness through sonic textures. However, the third-grade band, where she played flute and clarinet, was her initial foray into music. She then learned the guitar and started writing original songs — her first was about Egyptian history for a school project; another early one was a jingle for her family’s cleaning robot. Eventually, she started uploading demos on Soundcloud and Bandcamp that teeter back and forth between private and public, with lyrics that probe the disquiet experience of growing up as a girl online. Through these enthralling, visceral creations, Warncke gained a dedicated niche following in her hometown of Atlanta and the DIY scene of New York City before signing a deal with Danger Collective.

Inside the cozy restaurant, Warncke talks fast and jumps from story to story. She has a lot to say, although it’s never negative. Even during our off-the-record gossip, she admires the vulnerability of some people’s mental breakdown music and dedication to bitchy personas, offering a new perspective to my hasty-hater tendencies. We discussed hacks for finding inspiration, internet spirals, and the troubles of being a sexy, sad girl.

Congrats on your debut album! How does it feel to have this full-length body of work out?

I want to hide from it like that’s the reality of it. It scares me that people can see, hear, or whatever — which is also kind of the point of making music — but I am proud. I literally cannot believe that with everything else that I've been doing in my time, like working all these jobs — let me count how many jobs I worked while making this [counts off on her hands].

Oh my god, how many years was this?

Three years basically. I worked seven jobs, some at the same time, and I was in school, so I honestly can't believe it. I also lost my apartment and all this fucking fuck shit, but yeah, anyways [laughs]. This album makes me proud because I worked my ass off and proved how strong I can be.

But, also, it feels outdated. It doesn’t feel like me. Finishing an album is a 7-8 month process of getting it mixed, mastered, and doing a lot of stuff. I have more modern stuff that feels more in tune with what I’m going for now. But I am definitely happy that it's out.

What part of your life do you think this album would be a snapshot of then? Who were you, and what were you like during that period?

It feels like 2019 to 2020, then it stops there, which is the thing that’s so crazy to me when I look at the album. I was a million different people and have completely changed who I was and what I was going for so many times, and I can hear it in the songs too. I was anxious, depressed. I was very innocent, and then I was trying to de-innocent myself and then regretting that. I was working my ass off and not even thinking about anything except I’m working my ass off.

The Computerwife EP came out two years before the album, and within that period, there was a point where you deleted all of your music. What emotions were you feeling, and when did you realize you had to dig them back up?

That was my first experience paying for my apartment and shit. I was working way too hard but making a shit ton of money because I was working at a fine dining restaurant — now it’s probably a normal amount of money, but at the time, it felt like a lot — and I was partying and doing crazy shit.

All of my friends were gone. I only had one friend in New York, and it felt weird to call him every day, so I started meeting strangers. I basically, literally, chemically in my brain, screwed myself up. It was so bad. I finally called my parents and was like, I’ve been up for three days — I need to go home. I tried to make music during that period, but since I was changing so much, I felt like everything was so bad. I deleted it all when I got home. Then I started talking to my therapist, and she said I had to keep making music.

I refound my music when Danger Collective signed me because they asked if I had anything I was working on. I had sent some things that aren't on the album, but then I found this Google Drive with stuff I had sent to an ex-boyfriend — that ended up being this album.

What was it like rediscovering everything?

I was like, wow, this is way better than I thought. Now it’s funny because I probably don’t like it again — Jesus Christ. At the time of rediscovering, I was like, why did I think I was so terrible? I wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought.

There are some songs I still remember that play in my head that weren’t recovered, but it would be cool to try and recreate them. Paul McCartney did that one time.

The cover art features a lot of analog technology — record player, crt tv, boom box — which has an older connotation than your project name, Computerwife. How do these mediums interact in your work?

Well, I reject modernity and I honestly hate computers in every way, shape, and form — other than making music. The way I do things as far as visual inspiration — or at least I try to, but it doesn’t always fucking work — is I try to be inspired by things that happened 20 years ago. My friends and I were talking about the 20 years cycle, where culture resets itself around that time. After we started saying that, I realized this is an easy way to come up with cool ideas — even if it wasn’t cool then, it would be now. After I started doing that, it was pretty easy to do different art projects based on things from 20 years ago that might have just been literally a camp counselor’s art project.

This used to be on Tumblr, but I switched to Instagram because it’s easier for me, but I have this blog — it’s very private — of albums, pictures, music videos, and stuff from Flickr, Tumblr, and Instagram that people posted 20 years ago. Every year I reset it. I base my entire inspiration on that one year [laughs].

Continuing that, how do you spend your time online? Can you give me a run-through of a day on the internet for you?

There are two things that I do. Number one, I check in on my favorite people, whoever I idolize. I try to do that every day to see what people are up to — if anybody drops any new merch, music video, or whatever. Then I can have my mind centered for the day like this is something I should be thinking about; this is a cool idea, I can try to do my version. That’s when I wake up, which probably isn’t a good way to wake up because it’s comparing yourself to other people, but it’s how I get inspiration — especially when I’m not going to work and have free time, it’s awesome. Then I start my day like I'm going to do this all fucking day.

I’ll work on something for the rest of the day — I’ll make electronic music, rock music, design merch, or commission somebody. That’s when it feels good. When I’m at work, it sucks because I’m just thinking about shit that other people did.

The second thing, I spend all of my time sourcing images from Flickr, which inspires me directly instead of copying other people. I’d rather copy these people from Flickr, NPC people, an obscure video, or a piece of art that a three-year-old drew at camp — it’s better than an actual human being who is directly alive in your present time. That’s so dangerous and unhealthy. I try to be inspired by those people in a business form but not in an art form because that's where the biggest mistakes of my life have been from.

What are your favorite types of rabbit holes to fall through, and what are your go-to sites?

The only rabbit hole I ever fall through is looking up shit from 20 years ago. It started in 2018, so I've been doing it for five years now — God, that's scary. First, it was with Getty Images, which is not a good image website. Then I started doing it on Tumblr, which was betting for hearing music and seeing music videos, art, movies, and obscure art-oriented stuff. I was also using Instagram, but they changed their format, so you can no longer fucking see every post from a tag — it’s all filtered by fucking algorithms. I can’t see, like, what a random person in the Czech Republic with two followers posts, which sucks because that was my favorite part. So now it’s just Flickr and Tumblr. Flickr is good because it's time correct; people posted their stuff in 2003, which is cool; Tumblr is good because it’s art-oriented and fan-oriented.

How do you translate those experiences and findings into music?

I incorporated it more in my lifestyle and visual stuff, but it goes into the music too. If I release another album, I'd go way harder on that. But the sounds — like the actual sounds and tones of the guitar, sounds of the synths, and some of the rhythms used — are pulled from albums I've discovered.

In the future, I want to completely commit; I want to recreate albums that are lost in time but with my own ideas.

The name Computerwife almost represents being married to the internet. What is your relationship to the digital world?

I mean, if we are going to talk about being married to the internet, then I would definitely call it my ball and chain — like I'm dragging that shit around with me, unfortunately. I wish I didn't grow up with the internet. I wish sometimes that things were a lot more chill and normal. Sometimes it’s exciting because I feel like I can make the coolest world for myself, but that's a lot of pressure.

I wish I didn’t stalk people; I wish I didn’t compare myself to people and all that shit. I’m connected with lots of people in the music community, which is cool because every day is a new fucking thing to do, but then also every day — it’s just too much. I wish I was bored [laughs]. You know what I mean?

Some of your lyrics explore mental illness and antidepressants — thanks for the Lexapro representation by the way. What are your thoughts on how this is discussed on the internet, and what role do you think the internet has?

I think the internet gave me depression — like I do. It’s cool that you said that about “Lexapro” too, because I did not expect people to connect with it like how they did.

I feel like it’s always Prozac, Zoloft, never really Lexapro.

It's weird that mental illness is so sexy, and I literally still think that it is, but I hate it. I hate it so much. But I do think to be cool and sexy, you have to already be fucking doubting yourself and not be confident in yourself in some ways. Maybe I’m wrong about that.

I mean, I love saying I'm a sad girl, wallowing in it, and making art about it. It’s difficult because I don’t want to romanticize it too much, but it’s also like, what else am I going to do?

That’s how it started for me. I think there’s a chicken or egg situation — I wrote an essay about this for music because I was involved with the Skramz community. Like what came first, people being angry and depressed and making Skramz music or people listening to angry and depressed music and then fucking making themselves angry and depressed. I feel the same way about the internet, Tumblr, and shit like that.

Especially early Tumblr.

Growing up, thinking about it, I had pain throughout my life. I think everybody does. Then when I got involved with the Tumblr thing, I saw it expressed in a way that was very beautiful and sexy or whatever, which made me feel like I needed to be even more like that. Eventually, that turned into it, not to minimize the actual struggles that I had in my life, but I probably could have been fucking fine if I hadn’t tried to be some type of way.

What are you most excited about for your show at Baby’s?

I’m excited to see Downgrade and Shower Curtain — I’m excited for everyone to see them. I’m excited for them to meet each other because I think they’re going to get along, that’s what I’m looking forward to the most.