Real Slick, Jack: Psyche Organic Arrives in New York
Shop Psyche Organic at Happier Grocery and Dimes. Coming soon to @citarellagourmetmarket @unionmarket @gourmetgarage @deciccos @fairwaymarket plus many more.
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Shop Psyche Organic at Happier Grocery and Dimes. Coming soon to @citarellagourmetmarket @unionmarket @gourmetgarage @deciccos @fairwaymarket plus many more.
Held in Clinton Hill South, on a block lined with nineteenth-century row houses and tall, rough-barked trees, the dinner's location felt lived-in. It was a house, obviously old, but also welcoming. Knowing that the holidays can be a lonely time for many in their community, for this dinner, the collective really wanted to recreate “the nostalgia of being at home with family,” and as I watched everyone move around, catch up, sharing laughter, stories, and wisdom over glasses of wine and plates of food, it did feel like home — a space for a family sowing the seeds of a lasting legacy.
In the large sitting room, there were healing modalities people could take part in: ear acupuncture, craniosacral therapy, cupping, somatic therapy, and gua sha; Morning Glory, a Bronx-based community garden the girls frequently collaborate with, donated respiratory-support tea blends infused with raspberry leaf, shiso, mugwort, and echinacea; Milk Makeup put together product bags; Star Route Farms supplied Kevin, the night’s chef, with fresh produce for the menu; and attendees were also encouraged to bring their own dishes.
Historically, Black Trans people have faced significant barriers to building legacies and space, which has served as a balm and refuge for communities operating beyond heteronormativity, has also been the site of ongoing violence and erasure. In response, the collective asks: “How can collective care enable our community to exist in a way that is wealthy beyond financial means? And what does it mean to have wealth in our bodies, minds and hearts?” Positioned at the threshold, Demiyah and the collective’s members — Angel, Kam, Sinn, Divine, and Ramie — challenge the meaning of taking up space by actively imagining and creating new ones.
For Perez, “Nourishment can exist in so many different ways.” The dinners are an opportunity to expand the meaning of wealth from monetary excess to forms of nourishment that sustain the body in different ways. Beyond that, safety is of utmost important so attendees are also given cars to and from the space and a stipend of $100 for any other needs.
There was something dreamlike about being there, as if I had stepped into some kind of utopia. The love in the air was thick enough to slice through. Whether I had met some of these people minutes before, I felt embraced with open arms.
Ramie ran around the foyer taking portraits of everyone so that attendees could have tangible memorabilia to look back on. For Isa, whom I sat next to while trying ear acupuncture for the first time (more on that later), it was her second dinner. She attended the Angelito Collective’s screening of their sophomore film, ‘CIÓN, MAMI, at the Brooklyn Museum in June 2022, and her first dinner last February. Bunny, who sat next to her, was also trying ear acupuncture for the first time. For both of them, it was exciting to be around everyone, as much as it was to feel the buzz of electricity from the five points piercing their ears.
When it came time to eat, I sat down next to Divine and Kam who reflected on the many dinners up until then, “It’s nice to have a space like this, and some of these people have been coming around for three years, it’s like family.” Watching her, Angel, and Sinn move around the room making sure everyone had tried some kind of healing practice, had their portrait taken, and had eaten, it was clear how important this was to them. As the night drew to a close, I made my rounds to say goodbye to both familiar and new faces. Stepping into the kitchen, I was reminded of the joy shared that night by Ramie’s polaroids, which sat on the mantle for everyone to see.
The Angelito Collective sees As the girls plan their next dinner, they keep in mind that: “Creating a space of love where people can feel a sense of belonging and know that they are not alone, that they are loved and mean something to a lot of people is very important.” The vitality of this dinner as a testament to a future filled with many more, and what's most striking is that up until know, the dinners have been made possible entirely through crowdfunding and donations. Submissions for the next are now open, anticipated to happen at some point in the Spring.
You can donate and support the next dinner HERE.
They introduce Kim Rosenfield as “once the hottest teenage poet in LA,” to which she responds, “That was a long fucking time ago.” She prefaces, saying, “I’m also a psychotherapist, so if anyone wants to talk about what they just heard, come find me.” It’s fitting that Kim start the longest night of the year with a poem that she had wrote Halloween. “The veils were thin then. I hope they continue to be.” Her voice is haunting but her words are youthful. It’s clear why she describes Hell and herself as “eternal teenagers.” With her “melancholy on a budget” and “a goodbye so thick you could bite it,” she tells us that “home is just a path beaten over and over again. My favorite line: “It means a lot to me that I can still make myself cum the old fashioned way” — earns hums of admiration from the crowd — I doubt that many of them can say the same.
An academic and a member of Neoliberal Hell, Matthew Donovan brings me all sorts of places — here, Anna Delvey’s roof, etc — he’s one of the smartest people I know. “This poem is for my father,” he starts. No one claps. “If you hate your father I understand, you don’t have to clap.” People cheer. Matthew’s work is sharp — clever, but the kind of cleverness that begets survival. “This wasn't radical. This was an abject desire, scattered in Section 8 project-based housing, a rock thrown at my head, where I learned you could go blind from snorting blood.” Matthew says words we’re not allowed to write in press, remembering how his dad took him to Disneyworld and “lied to everyone that we were disabled so we could cut the lines. He pushed me out of my chair because I wasn’t convincing enough.”
I think this Peter Vack guy is the guy everyone talks about when they mention autofiction. He’s delayed coming to the stage, yelling, “Someone do a bit!” Erin talks about stealing from Rite Aid to make lemonade stands. “I’d be a great capitalist if I were one.” Peter dedicates the poem to his late friend: “He was the best Instagram user ever.” This is the modern age’s most loving epithet. This is what the Greeks wished they carved on pantheons. He’s a real 21st century poet. He makes jokes about looksmaxxing and The Dare, referencing meme formats and reminding me of Tom Robbins. “Your honor, my client was decolonizing Clandos.” This receives laughter and well-intentioned nods of solidarity.
Peter admits he’s from the Upper West Side and says more words I’m not allowed to write. “The real pandemic is reading. The real pandemic is readers.” Matthew Weinberger takes a picture of Peter that reminds me of that kid dressed like a monkey at the Apple store.
Kitty St. Remy has the coolest name ever. She reads with red boots angled inward and has a poem called “estrogen versus Viagra.” “The only thing they bought me was lube from Walmart, now I remember God is a product of human labor.” We’re floored. She talks about being called a “splendid bitch.” “I’m counting on debauchery and Babylon. I’m pouring wine down your throat at the orgy. All the girls you loved are here, ten years younger with deeper throats.” It’s devastation in a matter-of-fact drawl. Kitty St. Remy writes like her heart hardened out of necessity. This isn’t to say she’s not earnest. “If there’s a point in history where my words could be understood, I’d like to be there.” The tears in the eyes of some of the girls makes me believe she’s there.
Sean Thor Conroe sets a joint on the piano and apologizes in advance for “bumming us all out.” It's hard to read novel excerpts that aren’t all fluff with a few one-liners. But with Sean, each word means something. He writes about writers who die after meeting, writes about love in an endearingly scientific way — crushing on a girl by admiring her erect posture and symmetrical middle part.
In his story, a man stumbles through a passage that says, “the phallus transforms itself to make possible the conditions of love for women who need daily penetration to feel loved.” It’s a thinly-veiled metaphor on how love forces transformation. It’s an hilarious idea that women need (or receive) daily penetration. We laugh about that. In his story, they pull tarot cards on acid and don’t freak out about pulling the Death card because “we’re dying every day.” There's no laughter about that.
Last night, I was talking about this event, and a friend of mine said that my level of excitement would mirror hers for someone like Cher. I tell her Richard Hell is reading at KGB. She asks who that is. I say he’s “like, the Cher of punk rock.” I don’t know what I meant by that. Who am I write about Richard Hell? He puts his water on the piano and says, “We should celebrate the old year, not the new one, becuase they’re getting progressively worse.” He reads a poem about the start of the millennium, saying “I don’t want 2001 to end, I don’t want 1 or 0 to end. I don’t want to hold onto the past but I want to bring everything with me into the present. This is why they invented jesus.”
His hair hasn’t changed since the 70s. He reads from loose sheets of paper and talks about William Blake. I think about showing him the old commie bookstore I used to work at. He writes about ants and butts, saying, “‘Tub’ spelled backwards is ‘but’ which is almost ‘butt.’ This is how you get from ants to anal sex — with ‘u.’” Everything sounds like a punchline: “When I got out of bed and realized I couldn’t remember my dog’s name, I thought, ‘Dementia for sure.’ And then I remembered I never had a dog.” His poems combine esoteric language atrophy and irreverent humor. “Poets are fools but I don’t give a fuck,” adding suggestively, “... anymore."
“Life is only good if it’s well-written,” he says, and I’m back to my original question: Who am I to write about Richard Hell?
Erin and Britt close with a group carol, a nativity reenactment, and a bag of flour baby Jesus. At the end, they offer up the bag for groceries (Matthew Donovan takes it home). People a proclivity for consuming representations of Jesus — I wonder what baked good the body of Christ will become this time.
As we chat about the brand, we reflect on her first NYFW memories, her gradual reentry into the flow of nightlife, and the incriminating ‘cig pic’ that popped up on Instagram a few weeks ago.
Sahir— Hi, Princess. How are you?
Princess Gollum— I'm doing good!
SA— What have you been up to?
PG— Well, this weekend I went to a cute party, which was actually really fun. There were cute people, good music — this DJ, Sevyn, was playing and it was so amazing. Have you heard of them?
SA— Yeah actually, in New York. It was a cute set.
PG— Afterwards, we went up to the mini-mart, got some snacks and ate them in the car. What about you, how are you?
SA— I love a casual night. I’m good, I was in Paris for a couple weeks, visiting friends, making new ones. It was nice to be away from New York for a little.
PG— Yeah, that sounds nice. So, how do you know Anna [Bloda]?
SA— We crossed at a couple parties this year. What about you?
PG— She actually shot me for my first real photo shoot like 8 or 9 years ago, so it was cool to see her again and catch up.
SA— I loved the photos she took. How did you spend the day?
PG— She came over to my Airbnb in Beachwood, we had a cute little walk up and down the hill there and caught up. She was like, I don’t understand any of that, but cool, then told me a bit about her starting her own business. It was cool to see where we’re at now because we were very different when we first met. New York was also so fun back then; it was kind of my first fashion week experience and I remember how special that year was. I think it was 2017, when ‘health goth’ was just starting, and I was paired with this designer who was also really good friends with her.
SA— A ‘first’, that's the best. What do you remember from that time?
PG— I remember wearing sweatpants to a fashion show and running into Kelly Cutrone. I almost bumped into her accidentally so she turned around. I was so scared that she was going to read me like she does on America’s Next Top Model, but she just looked me up and down a few times, said, “That’s cute,” then walked away.
SA— She probably loved that. So you live in LA now?
PG— Yeah, I’ve been based in LA I've just spent some time in New York because I loved it so much.
SA— Do you still? The city’s changed so much.
PG— I haven’t as much as I want to but I do agree, with the time I’ve spent there since everything has opened back up, it really has a different energy.
SA— What sets apart a New York party from an LA party?
PG— I mean, first of all people dance at New York parties and I love that. The vibe is always better. LA parties, you know you’re going to have your picture taken so if you have a look on, that's great. Also in LA, I feel like there's always something that happens that's very meta or ‘of the time’ and the city almost feels like a set where everyone is playing a part. New York feels like you’re actually there to have a good time.
SA— I feel like New York is more and more like that.
Have you been going out a lot recently? I saw you at DJ'd CJ’s release party at H. Lorenzo a few weeks ago. That looked cute.
PG— It’s always fun being able to play music when the crowd doesn’t mind hearing something new, different, or a little bit off. I am one of those home bodies now especially after realizing sleep and drinking water makes me feel 100% better the next day; though I do think a once in a while outing, partying, dancing with friends is super important to balance out the rest of my life.
What about the omnipresent ‘cig break’ of the night?
PG— That's a really good question. I was just at a party yesterday and I had to pull my toothpicks out, which scares me sometimes because if I'm in a new space, I don’t want to be that girl, but it’s at this point that I’ve gotten rid of this habit and really don’t want to get back to where it was.
I also noticed that I definitely drink and do other substances less often after I stopped smoking because it would just kind of keep it going.
SA— I was laughing the other day when you posted that picture of you on your story sneaking a cig.
PG— [Laughs] I’ve actually had nightmares where I’m like, I’ve quit, I’m at Blip, people know that I’ve quit, so sneaking a cigarette somewhere and getting caught literally feels like TMZ ... then I lose my job and everything’s in a mess and on fire so I was playing into that, but yeah people are wild.
SA— LA really is a set huh?
PG— It’s really hard to not see it that way sometimes but what grounds me is that even actors are real people who go back to their real homes and lives after a day of ‘work’.
SA— So, when did you start smoking cigs?
PG— I started smoking cigarettes in high school, probably in like 10th or 11th grade.
SA— And vaping?
PG— Vaping was the last thing I quit. That was kind of the hardest to kick.
SA— What flavor was your go-to?
PG— Last night, someone offered me their lychee vape; that’s one of my favorites — and the matcha green tea. Oh my god, that will be the death of me.
When someone asks me … it is so tempting, but I try not to make a big deal out of it and just say, “No thank you.” There are a few tips that have helped so much, like knowing that a craving only lasts three to five minutes, so you just have to do something for that time and the uncomfortable feeling will go away. I also hate when my friends hide their face from me or feel like they need to hide their cigarettes. I try to make it feel like we can coexist and it’s not going to bother me. When it does, I let them know or just walk somewhere else and I’m very easily distracted so that helps.
SA— Did Blip come about as a result of quitting?
PG— So I was going through a health scare, which is what made me have to quit nicotine and all of that and it was really hard — I couldn’t do it cold turkey.
I was struggling to research the support and tools I could use to quit. Vaping felt so different of an addiction than I had with cigarettes. I was asking all of my friends what they had done and they were like, “Oh, girl, go back to cigarettes and you’ll be good.” and that wasn’t an option for me. I was about to use these nicotine patches, gum and all of that and wished that the options were cuter. One day, I was modeling for Starface, which I’ve done for a while, on set with Julie, talking about how I wished the experience was more celebrated — similar to how the stars normalize having acne. Why does quitting have to feel so alone? I was shaming myself ... getting shamed by other people. It really kind of sparked from there and that’s kind of how we started Blip.
SA— It’s funny how smoking paraphernalia has gotten so sexy ... while the majority of options to quit are still so bland.
PG— Yeah, exactly. We would love to innovate more in the space, but it's like a really good start — even with the toothpicks. I know it sounds so small but people really love it. It’s cool to see it out in the world and have people say that it’s really worked for them. It really helped me in a time where I needed it so to have others say they were able to cut down from three packs to one in a month is so nice. There’s something about making an experience more fun and relatable that helps the success of it too. If someone feels connected to a product there’s going to be more of a chance that they’ll actually try it.
SA— So there's gum, lozenges, and toothpicks?
PG— Yeah. The toothpicks don't have nicotine in them obviously, but they still make such a difference.
SA— More for the habit of having something in your mouth.
PG— Yeah, I mean some people don't want to use nicotine to get off nicotine so we just have those as an alternative, but if you’re really feening for a cigarette or a hit of your vape, if you have a lozenge or chew some gum, it literally makes you forget. It’s weird, you’d think you’d need the inhalation and everyone always says they’re not addicted to nicotine, just the feeling. I know that’s true, but it’s only half true because the chemical does make you addicted.
SA— I was reading the other day about how nicotine mimics this neurotransmitter in your body — acetylcholine — releasing dopamine, which is insane.
PG— Yeah, and it’s interesting to learn and become aware of the intrusive thoughts that your dependency gives rise to. I was making up all the excuses as to why I had to vape, because it was leaving my body and telling my brain, Get more, get more, get more.
SA— How have people responded since you launched?
PG— So good actually. We just launched in August so we’re going to start showing more testimonials and such, but we also suggest that people quit with other people because it does help. Although it is still such a personal decision to make, buddying up is so important; I quit with my business partner and co-founder, Alyson.
She wasn't vaping as crackhead-y as me, she was more of a social smoker — the cute, I'll have a cigarette when I go out, kind — but having that support and someone to talk to about little things that are kind of embarrassing to talk about really helps. The reassurance I had when I started to backtrack and question my thoughts was really nice.
SA— And Blip is available in CVS right? I love that it's in a physical space so people who aren’t online as much have an opportunity to try it. Could you see it being available at other pharmacies soon?
PG— Yeah, we really want to be everywhere, and personally, I’d love if we were anywhere cigarettes and vapes are sold — so like every smoke shop, but I know that’s challenging because most will think, Why would I carry the thing that gets you off what makes me the most money?
Overtime, I feel like people’s viewpoints are going to change a bit especially with all the bans that have been occurring. People are realizing how vaping really isn’t sexy. When you open one up it’s literally a cotton ball filled with fake fluid touching a battery that heats up with a coil. It’s actually super gross, but obviously, you choose your vices and I don’t want to sound judgy or anti-vape, but once you start learning more about it, it’s really hard not to see it that way. Follow us at @blipworld to see where we end up next :)
SA— What else have you been up to this year?
PG— I have loved dedicating a majority of my time to building Blip this past year and a half because it helped me really prioritize, which I’ve never properly done. Commitment is pretty scary to me. I like floating and flexibility and freedom. It takes a whole lot of research, time to sit with, thinking (probably to the point where it’s overthinking) until I commit but once I do, I’m pretty stuck to it until I die.
During the earlier stages of Blip, like I said, I went through a health scare, got into a pretty horrible car wreck (I’m okay now), and learned of my father’s passing, which really were the catalysts to starting therapy — for both physical and mental health. I just finished my full year and a half and feel incredibly proud of staying consistent with the dedication to progress and wanting to live and love better. Learning to ask for help has also been such a lesson, still something I struggle with but the more I try, I learn that there’s so much healing and love in receiving as much as giving.
Some career highlights were being in my girl Doja’s “Agora Hills” music video as well as appearing in Yoon’s Ambush x Nike Nite Sport trailer. While working on a passion project with Edgar Daniels called DISCONNECTION, I rediscovered my yearn for creating — my love and dream to keep being able to make cool shit until I die. Really hoping that being an ethereal, creepy creature goddess in a sci-fi movie is in my future as well. Someone told me recently everything I say comes to life so here’s to me saying what I want 2024.
SA— Tell me about learning how to do your own nails, that sounds fun.
PG— Have you ever seen my manicures? If you see my coloring books from when I was a child you would immediately see that I’m not a coloring in the lines type of girl. God missed me with the handy skills but it was really an act of trying to learn something new, having fun, and hopefully keeping myself distracted enough from my nic cravings.
I also noticed when I quit, I suddenly had an urge to bite my nails and I needed to put a stop to that. No judgment if you are nail biter (it is pretty gross) but it does do something, I know it feels good, I just have too many quirks already and really didn’t need to add that one to the bill. I haven’t really had more than one week without having my nails done and that’s fab to me.
SA— How else are you staying sane?
PG— Finding time to truly relax my whole body and mind — another thing I don’t think I ever knew how to properly do and something I’m working on actively. Doing absolutely nothing gives EVERYTHING, especially for artists. This is when I can reflect, reassess, and make room for newness. Having support reminds me that it’s about progress not perfection. Other than Nintendo Switch games, I play solitaire and chess on my phone and I just downloaded Rummikub so add me there ;)
I am also obsessed with red led light therapy, literally making me feel like a million bucks every time.
SA— Songs on repeat?
PG— Every year there’s a Kanye song/album that really gets me through and this year it was Graduation. ‘I Wonder’ still makes me cry every time. ‘How Deep is Your Love’ has also been in rotation with sprinkles of new artists/music I’m obsessed with — Aliyah’s Interlude, Bby Africka, Tube Girl, Sexyy Red, Britney Manson, Olivia Rodrigo, Deto Black and Slicc Mic.
I love all these girls so much! I don’t think they know how much they’ve kept me sane this year. XOXOXOXOXO MUAH to all of them and only them.
SA— Any trends for next year that you already hate?
PG—The rich getting richer and the poor, poorer. Even more division within groups of people; no new concepts here, but things I really hate seeing in fashion and art. When we don’t have to constantly respond to capitalism and pour our souls into the machine, I wonder what new big propositions can be added to the space. One thing I wish people understood more is that when the pendulum swings heavily one way, it’s just a matter of time for it to swing the other way. Was really anticipating a true 'indie sleaze' movement this year but I haven’t seen it done right yet.
SA— What are you hoping for?
PG— I’m in high hopes for less drops, higher consciousness, and purpose driven work. 2024 will be the SWAG ERA. Selfishly, I would love a reggae/ska revival. I’ll always be a scene girl but very punk at the core. I love when there’s “fuck it” trends that are hard to manipulate top down and ones that are organically made by the people on the internet that’s a collective idea that drives. These are the most fun for me to not only see but to also be a part of.
Ps. less Zooms, more face time
Pps. normalize repeating looks as long as they're worthwhile
Ppps. Bows can stay for a lil while longer ꣑୧
Pppps. Hello Kitty forever!!!